How ADHD Can Look Different in Girls
- Alison Schroeder
- Dec 4
- 3 min read
For many years, ADHD was described using a pretty narrow picture: a child who can’t sit still, blurts out answers, and bounces from one thing to the next. Because that image became so familiar, countless girls grew up without anyone realizing they were struggling with ADHD too. Their symptoms were often quieter, more internal, and easier to overlook—by parents, teachers, and sometimes even by the girls themselves.
Today, we know that ADHD shows up differently across genders, and understanding those differences can help more girls get the support they need earlier.
The “Quiet” Presentation: Why Girls Get Missed
Girls are far more likely to show inattentive symptoms rather than the hyperactive, high-energy traits we typically associate with ADHD. Instead of running around the classroom, a girl with ADHD may be:
Staring off into space
Losing track of conversations
Forgetting steps in multi-step directions
Struggling to start or finish assignments
Daydreaming instead of showing overt physical restlessness
Because these behaviors don’t disrupt others, adults may interpret them as personality traits (“she’s shy,” “she’s dreamy,” “she’s sensitive”) rather than red flags that she’s working twice as hard just to keep up.
The Emotional Side: Internalizing Instead of Externalizing
Girls with ADHD often internalize their struggles. Instead of acting out, they may experience:
High levels of anxiety and perfectionism
Low self-confidence, especially around school
Emotional overwhelm or outbursts that seem to come “out of nowhere”
Chronic feelings of falling behind, even when they appear successful
Because these emotions look more like “mood issues” than attention-regulation challenges, girls are frequently misdiagnosed with anxiety or depression before anyone considers ADHD.
Masking and Overcompensating
Many girls become experts at masking—hiding their difficulties by working extra hard, staying quiet, or copying what others do to appear organized or on track. Teachers may describe them as “model students” while inside they’re exhausted.
Masking might look like:
Spending hours redoing assignments to “make it perfect”
Keeping messy backpacks or bedrooms hidden from others
Memorizing routines instead of truly understanding them
Appearing calm at school but melting down at home
Masking can work for a while, but over time it becomes overwhelming. When puberty and increasing academic demands hit, symptoms often become more noticeable.
Social Dynamics: Subtle Difficulties With Friends
ADHD can also affect friendships in ways that fly under the radar. Girls may:
Miss social cues
Interrupt without meaning to
Overshare when excited
Struggle with conflict or boundaries
Feel easily rejected or excluded
These patterns can leave girls feeling confused about why friendships feel harder for them than for their peers.
When ADHD Goes Undetected
Untreated ADHD in girls can lead to:
Persistent anxiety and burnout
Chronic disorganization
Academic struggles
Feeling “not good enough” despite working incredibly hard
Increased risk of depression in adolescence and adulthood
Understanding the signs early can change the trajectory of their confidence and well-being.
Getting Support Makes a Big Difference
The good news is that girls respond extremely well to support once their ADHD is recognized. Therapy can help them:
Understand how their unique brain works
Reduce anxiety and perfectionism
Strengthen emotional regulation
Develop healthier routines and self-confidence
Parents often feel relief too, realizing that their child wasn’t “being difficult,” but trying to navigate a brain that works differently.
If You Suspect ADHD in Your Daughter
You don’t need certainty to reach out for help. An ADHD evaluation or consultation can bring clarity and offer next steps. Creative Coping offers simple ADHD assessments that can help with some preliminary answers and allow us to create a plan of treatment that works for her unique brain.